How to say good-bye

Don't screw it up at the end. I've been thinking about this lately given all the turnover going on around me. It sounds easy, yet there seem to be a lot of ways to do it badly.

I had one boss who was extremely well liked by his business users and his own staff. He flubbed the good-byes, and that's what everyone remembered. When staff members would leave, he would frequently miss the good-bye party, and that soured their memories of him later. When he switched to a different project, he never again stepped foot near his old users -- not even to tell them that he'd been given a new project -- and they felt completely abandoned.

Another guy I worked with adamantly refused to allow or participate in any kind of farewell party or drinks for him on his way out. Obviously he didn't want the attention, but how hard is it to grant this simple request? Up until that point, we all thought he was a normal, good guy. Only someone who was pathologically self-conscious couldn't bear to stand around for an hour smiling at people, so we started wondering.

Finally, there's the old standard, whether you've been laid off or are quitting: the good-bye email. Unless you have an axe to grind AND you intend to use it, keep it simple.

The greatest example of having a serious axe is Ken Hamidi. The legal battle over his "good-bye emails" to Intel lasted 8 years. He complaints were serious and real, he refused to settle, and he ultimately won several lawsuits Intel filed against him.

Most of us just have small gripes and complaints. Keep them to yourself. Send a kind, professional email to the co-workers you liked, then leave the bad feelings at the door on your way out.

The weirdest email I ever received came recently, when two people were quitting on the same day. The first guy sent a polite, professional email. The second sent his email about a half hour later -- the same email, but with a few phrases and adjectives moved around. Apparently, he found sending a simple email so difficult he had to plagiarize someone else's!